[big4]

AND TO ANYONE ELSE WHO HAS CORRESPONDED WITH ME OR WHO WOULD LIKE TO GIVE ME SOME GOOD ADVICE...


Some time ago... almost one year to be exact, in one of my sleepless nights, I stumbled upon this site... to my wonder I discovered a whole new world, one which is filled with people with a passion for offroading... I had no real concept of what offroading was and am still learning lots... I posted a thread a couple months back, one re: the ultimate offroad family vehicle... which resulted in a MONSTROUS RESPONSE... I know quite a few of you did indicate that there is really no such thing--b/c it is really too dangerous to take your family... but now, as my "own concept" of "offroading" has crystallized I realize that what I am interested in is really "mudding" and "logging roads"... amateur beginner stuff in a very safe 4-5 passenger truck... more realisticly probably a capable machine that will probably turn out to be a grocery getter-- as I have family-- What I would like is some ADVICE... REAL, TRUE, AND HONEST... if it get's personal please feel free to email me directly...

... here's the situation, I have bought my "dream truck"-- 78 Bronco-- rebuilt engine, redone front axle, very good condition A/T 31's, working tail gate, even comes with a professionally installed CD player... best of all... all this stuff has receipts to prove it...

AND NOW MY WIFE WANTS ME TO GET RID OF THAT STUPID TRUCK!! "I HATE IT!!"... "I DIDN'T MEAN IT WHEN I SAID... SURE YOU COULD BUY IT, BUT DON'T TELL ME WHEN YOU DO!"

NO... I am NOT trying to get you guys to solve a domestic dispute... (Although having a group of friends show up at my door to plead my case did run through my head)...

I was just wondering how any of you got your spouses, family and friends to support you, particularly those with people who were adamantly against 4x4's and truck stuff...

We have a great relationship... only thing she doesn't believe in is my interest (actually passion) for this hobby... To the few guys that I have met so far or talked to... you "seem" like "normal guys"-- HOW DO YOU MAKE IT WORK...

PLEASE... NO REPONSES RE: GETTING RID OF THE WIFE (although the thought did cross my mind)...

some good responses please... cuz I need help... I am stuck... and need help getting out...

BIG4-- (PETER)

ps... the decision to purchase the truck, was definitely NOT a spur of the moment decision... it has been a year of research and discussion on this board...

pps... if not... I am afraid that I will have to ditch the truck... ***BIG SIGHHHHH***

CURRENTLY CONSIDERING OFFERS AROUND $2500...

PPS... HEY LARS... IS THERE ANYWAY YOU COULD
PRESENT ME WITH A CERTIFICATE-- CERTIFYING ME AS A GENUINE MUD NUT??--then maybe she would believe this is not a side interest?...

 

[mudrunner]

good luck! i have been in that some war with my parents for the past 2 years, what they have tought me is that is you offroad as a hobby it is very $$$$$$$$. how to get your family to like 4x4ing? well that is a tough one! make sure you put your FAMILY FIRST!!!!!! if 4x4ing means more to you than your family, dude that would be for you to work out!!
just my .02
hope that may help a little and hope you and your family come to a agrement!!!!!!!

 

[NOYFB]

I'm in the same boat, but as long as I need a vehicle she lets me have my jeep, supplying her with a nice new shiny GMC greases the wheels a lot too. but there is no way she'll let me get something else for a daily driver, or a parts truck, or a project truck. but she lets me spend a lot of money into my jeep (currently undergoing eng swap)as long as its the only mode of transportation I have.

Do you have another vehicle as a daily driver? if so talk her into selling that and putting the money into the bronco. when my wife was out of town a couple of weeks ago I heard of a 1974 bronco for $300 only needed a battery and an alternator, so I took $300 and was prepared to buy it no matter what my wife would have said, I know I would have been in the dog house for a long time. but it turned out to be a '79 so I wasn't interested. but I caught shlt for it anyway. basically I'm just babbling and have no good advice, so good luck!

 

[EBES]

If you just got your dream truck and you've been talking about nothing else, then she probably thinks it will detract from your time spent with her. Women, excepting the ones from this board, don't always understand why we love to go offroad so its up to you to show her. Heres what ya do.

Make sure she has a day off and the next if possible. Wake up early, pack a picnic basket and a bottle of wine(optional), a warm blanket to lie on and some flowers in a plastic vase(so it doesn't break). Watch for good weather obviously. Take her up to Anderson lake for the day or somewhere equally beautiful and romance the sh#t out of her. Then let her know (while you're snuggling)how important family is and how you love spending time with her. Tell her(if she enjoys herself on the trip) how you would love to do things like this with her more often. Make her feel good about herself and above everything, NEVER STOP DATING YOUR WIFE! Oh yeah, don't mention the truck, keep the focus on her and you as a couple.
Good luck.

This message brought to you by Doctor Love.




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EBES
95 Bronco "The Mule"
Takes a lickin and keeps on kickin
Port Moody.
[email protected]

 

[McJeep]

OMFG !!!

What is all this "brown nosing to keep my truck" stuff that I'm reading. I just finished deleting a too long reply to this as I'm not a marriage counselor. Holy crow people, are you telling me that this poor guy has to grovel just to keep a truck that he obviously bought with family outings in mind? Gimme a break

Load up the kids for a good camping or wheeling weekend and have fun.

Rob (in a cozy 20 year marriage where no one "tells" anyone what to do)

 

[Sid the Squid]

Shouldn't this thread be posted under
"The Politics of Fourwheeling"

Seriously though the picnic run is a great idea.
Do trail crawls, lots of scenery, lots of stops, at least one every couple of hours with facilities (read out-house)coffee shops even better.

Try hooking up with guys taking their wifes out.

Never take them out with the guys 4byin. IMHO based on not a few years the only women that like hard core 4byin with a bunch of crude talking, crotch scratching, smelly men, are girls on the hunt. & I don't mean what your thinking. They are looking for some wild thing to domesticate. I have a couple of male relatives that have been lost to these bait-&-switch skeams.
Before they get married they love sports, 4byin and livin large.
After - clean carpets, lid down, family sedan.
Now don't get me wrong nothing wrong with that but they do have a concern that after polishing up a guy for all those years they don't want to lose him going ferral.
And really, do you want to throw away the next 10 years to credit card debt? Thats why the most common question is "how cheep can you build up a respectable 4by"

Keep it in balance and relize that for them to have fun doing what you like it needs taming down.

Happy Wife - Happy Life

Now go out and enjoy.

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4x4pics

[This message has been edited by Sid the Squid (edited February 24, 2002).]

 

[MEK]

You have to bring it in under the guise of a Daily driver, then start cutting after a while. Kind of like how she will bring home new shoes and put them in the closet for a while and then say I've had these for weeks. My wife is just happy I've stopped buying motorbikes ever year, the ATV I just got does not count

Now if you had bought the Runner like I suggested, you could crank the torsion bars, extended shackle, sneak an E locker in the back and she would not be the wiser.

Mike.

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85 Flat deck toyota, chevy's, new frame, for sale.

 

[jason-ramsey]

I have to agree with the last to posts. I have a wife and kids also and she doesn't like me spending money money on my rig, so compromise is what I do. If she is doughting your truck now DO NOT take her on a trip where there is a possibility of breakage she will not want to stand around for awhile. But do take her on the nice drives. ie vancouver to harrison to sloquet to skookumchuck to pemberton to whistler then home. She would love that make a weekend of it.

my .02 Jason

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92yj d44 front& rear.4.09
33 geolanders
mazda 626 seats
2.5 susp lift 3" body
Ramsey pro+ 8000
SOA coming in Jan bye bye body lift hello 8" suspension lift

 

[fordfan]

My wife let me trade her car (93 Asuna Sunfire) for my truck (79Broco). We also have a 2 ear old daughter who is nuts about the thing. My wife enjoys 4-wheeling and camping though, but not as much as she uesd too...


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1979 Ford Broco
400M Edelbrock 4bbl
12" lift
35" Bfg Mudders

 

[ROCKRUNNER]

I dont post that often but had to get in on this one. If your wife doesnt enjoy it now its going to be pretty hard to get her to down the road. It has to be in your blood. Its kind of like eating brussel sprouts. If youve never liked them you never will. What doesnt she like about it? Bouncing, getting muddy, fixin the truck? What she has to do is find something she really enjoys, and you guys compromise. She goes out with you wheeling and you go with her to whatever she wants to do. My wife has been wheeling since she was a baby so its in her blood. Now she doesnt go with me everytime I go usually on the hardcore rockcrawling, but if I want to go she never stops me. I guess im lucky that way because she understands my passion for this hobby. Now I give her plenty of notice saying im going out next weekend do you want to come? If she doesnt she does her own thing. She deffinately doesnt miss out on camping trips or wheeling trips because she loves the camping aspect of it. One thing she has said to me is it is sometimes quite boring being a passenger. So if she wants to drive I let her sometimes LOL. Last time I did that I couldnt get (now heres a word to use) OUR TRUCK back. She just kept going by me with this big grin on her face lovin every minute of it. One other thing is dont neglect her vehicle, if it needs something fix it, although thats not the case usually but i get around to it eventually I would have to say that would be most of the wifes gripes. YOU SPEND SO MUCH TIME AND MONEY ON YOUR TRUCK BUT YOU WONT FIX MY LITTLE CAR! Sound familiar guys? Anyway try to compromise and let her drive in the bush. Good luck to you Peter

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Coquitlam Crawlers Membership/Events Coordinator

90 F250 Dana 60 up front,welded rear,7.3 Diesel,3" exhaust,4" skyjacker suspension,3" body lift 38" swampers,cb and custom bumpers and nerf bars. You either make it or break it!

 

[bushbuggy]

Just tell here to be glad shes not with me. My fiance can't believe the amount of time/ cash I put into my rig.
But on a good note I am still 8000.00 under what it costs to buy a stock tj. (at least thats what I keep telling myself)

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This 4x4 thing is starting to take away from my beer fund.

 

[A Girls Toy]

Try and get your wife to go on one of the outings where you know other guys are gonna bring their wifes, then she can meet some of the people and can hear and see for herself how much of a good time we all have and how the majority of people are really good people and that with having this as a hobby you can make a whole lot of really nice friends and then she will see that it is a family event cause some of us also bring our kids and the kids love it when they also get to meet new friends. Well good luck hope you get to keep your truck and maybe we will see you on the trail sometime!

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[email protected] Coquitlam Crawlers 4x4 club
Hit it FAST, hit it HARD, and if it breaks make Udermind? fix it!

 

[Ottotek]

Hers my $.02 worth and in no particular order of importance.

I have always wanted a Land Cruiser, my compramise was to get a 90 4Runner. I had originally thought of getting a 85 but since it is a daily driver my wife convinced me on the second body generation. If I had two vehilces I would have had the Cruiser and a family hauler but money ruled this out. The 4Runner is very capable and there are lots of mods I can add to it. I have already reached the "its to hi to get" into and hopefully rock sliders will solve that problem - see how this works? You make her happy by solving the problems you created by adding the things you need!

My wife does not like 4 wheeling or camping but she feels that our daughter should have the experience. My wife agrees to go camping once each year so that our daughter can go camping. I have taken my wife up Eagle Ridge but she really thought it was nuts. I agree take the wife somewhere tame and scenic - compromise is worth domestic harmony. I would approach you wife with the angle that your children need to spend time with Dad doing Dad stuff like camping and 4x4ing.

Lots of clubs on the net are family oriented and if you joined a club run your wife would have other wives to complain with and maybe that would help. With a club run maybe your wife will realise you are not the only guy who enjoys this and that we are mostly family folks who enjoy exporing the outdoors in their own way.

Ok, I am rambling but your dillema rings very close to home and I am sure you are not alone in the we do not have the same hobbies debate.

Best of luck and if I can help let me know. One good trip experience can make all the difference!

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Me Tarzan u ? Favorite tool?
Monkey wrench!
I am the original shade tree mechanic

 

[bushbuggy]

I agree with everyone else on the idea that you sould take her on a nice senic drive throught the mountains. Hey any day in the bush beats 10 days in the city.
(Ahhh if only I could drive logging roads every day to work).

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This 4x4 thing is starting to take away from my beer fund.

 

[vinsimo]

I think you should do what everyone is saying take her out 4Xing. But one other thing you could do is let her drive. Let her rip it up in the mud. I let my girlfriend drive my truck and she loves it. She loves driving it on the street too, she thinks its cool when guys are checkin out the truck and they see her driving and they get a suprised look on there face like, "Wow a girls driving that beast!" I also always take the girlfriend camping so she knows if we get rid of the truck no more fun camping trips! Good luck!

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88 XJ gonna be nice soon.
www.teamrush.web.com

[This message has been edited by vinsimo (edited February 24, 2002).]

[This message has been edited by vinsimo (edited February 24, 2002).]

 

[Toyrantula]

My fiance only has 1 problem and that is getting in the Toyota. She did have problems at first, but realized it was something we can do as a family.

We don`t do the hardcore wheeling, just exactly what you mentioned, logging roads etc.

I have met good , honest people from the wheeling community and have had opportunites to do community service etc that I would not have done by myself.

Other things like pulling motorists out of ditches in winter, Canada day cleanups.

So I think we are better off having our 4x4 than not having it.

Besides, you couldn`t have this much fun in a LOWRIDER!! Been there done that.

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TOY`s Phoenix Gold Car Audio

 

[2bit]

It's a sign of which way your relationship will end up.You just got it and she's saying the truck or me.Drop some of your other hobbies in favor of this hobby.If you are not allowed a hobby you will end up a very unhappy man!And if you're not "allowed"(help,mommy)drop her before you have any kids to make miserable.

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93bronco

 

[big4]

hmmmm... LMFAO... unfortunately, have started the family already... and have to rule out divorce cuz she fights to tough... I would be lucky to have my underwear, nevermind my truck after we fight it out in the courts...LOL... Any others out there who have been through this? I am in a very strange predicament, cuz this truck is the ONLY thing that she has ABSOLUTELY HATED AND BEEN AGAINST... Even worse, I have fallen majorly hard into the BC4X4 cult... LOL... The ideas re: taking her on a trip would be good if only I could even get her to sit in the vehicle. As of now, she doesn't even know how the inside looks... To her it is a big, rusting piece of **** !! ARGGGGGHHHHHHH... OOOOH I'M DYING!!! To those of you who are laughin yo asses off... it aint dat funny... what if you weren't able to keep your truck? I know, this is quite pathetic... I am a grown man who is considering breaking down and throwing the BIGGEST ASSED TEMPER TANTRUM OF MY LIFE!!... actually, I take that back... go ahead... laugh... even I am wondering why I am so attracted to this sport... I don't even have one single friend who is remotely interested in 4x4ing... so yah... most of my NEW friends will be from the board... hmmm maybe I could run away from home?-- mail monthly cheques to the wife and kid...??

peter

ps... don't get me wrong guys... when I am typing on this board it is purely on my spare time, time when I can't sleep... time after the kid has gone to sleep... I really have spent next to nothing on the truck, and little if any time at all working on it... actually just bought it, a truck club, and it has been sitting in front of my house... after buying it, I still haven't even driven it yet... sheesh!!

[This message has been edited by big4 (edited February 24, 2002).]

 

[lars]

Big4, the first thing you need to do (and tell us) is WHY your wife doesn't like the Bronco! Is it because it's ugly, or because she doesn't think you guys can afford it, or because you're spending too much time with it, or what?

If it's a money thing, then by all means you need to get your financial house in order.

...lars

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19911995409993004:144444.103512.58274



Join | BC4X4 | .com

 

[big4]

nope... not $$$... although she uses that excuse as well... since she knows full well that I completely understand her indulgences as well... She does think it is ugly as hell however...

pete

ps... one further point... she doesn't see the point in putting in money into an old piece of junk in which we would never get back the $$$... she isn't stupid... she does realize that truck will be modified and upgraded continually...

[This message has been edited by big4 (edited February 24, 2002).]